The Tie Breakdown

The floral design tie:
Possibly the most misused, mismatched and thoroughly misunderstood tie of all. Enigmatic in its ability to look bad, ugly or exquisite from day to day, from shirt to shirt. Very hard to pull off. However, its also the tie that holds the most promise in some cases due to its detail and complexity. The floral tie has the ability to adjust depending on the shades of your shirt and suit.
The striped classic tie:
The most used tie of all time. A striped tie can make any suit and shirt combo gleam; however, just like all the rest, it has to be used well and picked appropriately. A misconception persists to this day that a tie must include one of the colours in the shirt or suit. Wrong. A tie should above all complement a shirt's design and stripes. The next step is colour, which it should also complement rather than mimic. For example, a bold striped shirt with a bold striped tie is a no no, so is a thin striped shirt with a thin striped tie- the two will clash and either amplify the effect or minimize it. What need to be done is a combination of both, pick something that stands out, but not too much. Pick a colour complementing the shirt and tie. You may look like a fool going through fifteen ties, putting them next to your shirt and suit, but trust me, that is a much better looking fool than someone who commits a serious faux pas and dares ot walk out of their door.

The plain tie:
This kind should be reserved for certain occasions only. A plain tie in black or maroon can look dashing, but its not the office look. Its much more of a party at the Ritz Carlton, or high tea at the Marriott type of affair. So, save it. And if you're not going to any of these kinds of places, don't buy it. Keep your money for something better. I don't go to such parties, and I don't have any tie that even resembles plain.

The busy tie:
The busy tie is usually a bad tie. There has to be a distinction made here first, though. You see, many busy ties are also the best ties ever made. Designers like Ermenegildo Zegna can work wonders when working with a tie design that employs various colours, designs and shades. It can truly be a work of art. But, since many of us (including yours truly) cannot afford such masterpieces, it is advisable to stay cautious. A busy tie can first of all, overshadow everything including your face or what you are saying. It can also make itself look like the centre of attention, hence making the rest of your outfit look tacky. And all that will be true, only if the tie is actually nice. If its not a very nice tie, and it happens to be busy too- you're in trouble.

The designer tie:
Many a times I find people (and indeed, have found myself) wearing smashing ties but still not looking good. When appraising my own get up one day I realised what the problem was, I had spent way too much on my tie (which I love, as you can see) and not enough on the rest of my outfit. I found that the suit did not do justice to the tie, neither did the shirt. Hence, the tie I had sent so much on, and the tie that I loved so much, actually made the whole outfit less impressive. It overshadowed the shirt, and lessened the oomph of the suit. So, the moral is that one should know their complete look, and critically analyse their outfit before going out and buying a piece of clothing that does not match the rest of the outfit. I have made this mistake many a time, I can tell now.

The polka dot tie:
I never liked polka dot ties. Then I found one I really loved. So I like polka dot ties now. But that still does not mean I will do a wierd dance everyone someone comes in carrying an accordion. I refuse. Seriously though, these ties can be fun- especially, if they employ a few colours. But make sure that the colours all complement the shirt and suit. Because I find that in polka dotted designs, if one colour does not work well, it just stands out a lot more and people start to look like they are carrying around little bingo dots or something like that. Does Bingo have dots? I don't know. Just be cautious.

The "before you buy anything else" tie:
This is the quintessential classic. I mean this is the tie of your dreams. Its beautifully made, its in your price range. But, you don't have anything to go with it. Well, think about it for a second. Do you really like it? I mean really really like it? Like it enough that you will go out and buy a shirt next month for it? Ok, then. Buy it. Some of the most beautiful pieces of art and clothing fall right into our laps sometimes and its criminally unjust to walk away due thearts that Mastercard has been sending. They're on the phone, what can they do? No, Uzi's not here, sorry.

The idea is to go through your mind's catalogue and pick out atleast one suit or pair of pants which would go nicely with the tie and the yet to be bought shirt. If you can pick one out, go ahead. I have done this many a times and each time, I have been very happy with the results.

The non-silk tie:
This specimen can be easily defined as the work of the devil. The devil is bad. Everything he does is bad. So, to put it succintly, stay away from non-silk ties.

The cartoonish tie/musical tie:
No. No. NO. Not allowed. Not appreciated. Ties with Donald Duck, Mickey Mouse or any sort of musical tune in them are not cool. Neither are Elvis Presley ties. Ugh!

The best ties:
There are numerous companies that make amazing ties. To me however, one name stands head and shoulders above the rest - Ermengildo Zegna. Simply astounding ties come from this company. I have never been able to afford one, but I have never come across a design of theirs that I have disliked. They do highly impressive work. Sometimes, a Zegna tie uses upto fifteen different colours, and it all works so beautifully. Nothing clashes, nothing stands out - its a fluid beauteous silk able to stand on its own, or to complement anything in your wardrobe. A Zegna tie is a classic. It is my most cherished hope that I'll own one of their ties very soon.

There you have it. Everything you wanted to know about ties, ever. There are huge gaps of course in this list, what about ties with diamonds on them? Or strokes? Or shading? Well, its all the same in the end. Pick carefully, make sure you feel comfortable with it hanging around your neck and pick something complementary. A tie is not a must in most events, but a well picked and appropriately used tie can make all the difference to a guy's look.

Here's a website that sells ties that inspired this post: www.nakedandangry.com. My favorite is the one on the homepage named Floral Regiment. Just click on it, it looks beautiful.