lost memories

i've lost photographs before
but memories linger,
like yellow stained fingers,
in chemicals and compounds...
...some things i adore.

and i've
burned photographs before.
adolescent nonsense
fueled by hormones in control,
no less.

i wish alchemy had ways
to take carbon waste
and reclaim memories from ash.

i miss those photographs.

and i've found photographs.
stolen moments telling stories
of friends forgetting to ask,
of wisecracks and laughs,
stories of you
and who
that no one understands.

the third person perspective
sometimes comforts me.

i love those photographs.

i wish i'd counted
the seconds i spent
waiting for an image
to appear on the
paper you gave me,
reaching, introspective, into
sickly yellow darkrooms
that confuse fumes and process
with perfection and accidents.

double exposures that fabricate ghosts,
beautiful photographs.

i wish alchemy had ways
to take carbon waste
and reclaim memories from ash.

i miss those photographs.