A polite note for the office girls

Please immediately stop saying ‘literally’ in every sentence. I think it extremely unlikely that your friend was literally born with a silver spoon in her mouth, that Justin Timberlake literally blew the roof off the arena, that Vernon from Accounts was moving so fast at 5 o’clock that he was literally on fire, that the wind literally took the skin off your face, and that last night’s vindaloo literally blew your head off. If I hear this misused expression once more, I will literally mutilate you. Thank you.